Sometimes I think we'd rather do anything than pray. Our flesh fights against it. The world around us seems to want to interrupt us. Why?
I remember Peter, James and John in the garden of Gethsemene with Jesus. Jesus asked them, "What, could you not watch with me one hour?" Then He told them to watch and pray with Him that they would not enter into temptation yet they were sleepy and they kept giving into their bodily desires.
But I can't point a finger at them. I have slept at times I should have been vigilant and prayed. But it's not just about sleeping. I have done a thousand things rather than pray.
But why have I failed to reach out to my Creator sometimes when I know that a wonderful hour of spiritual communication with Him is what I need most of all?
I have come to the conclusion that deep prayer (not just a bowing of my head for a few seconds or even minutes) but a true time set aside for God where I lay my life out before Him and seek His face is one of the hardest things in the world to do but one that reaps the most benefits.
Given my belief, why is something so easy to do, so difficult to accomplish?
Could it be that quietening the mind and focusing on God is such a profound thing I would rather focus on the more mundane? Could it be I have difficulty acknowledging the magnificence of being able to communicate with my Creator in the midst of my busy life?
Could it be that I'm just selfish and want to do what I want to do?
I have been to places in my life when prolonged deep prayer was the only thing that enabled me to continue on. It was during those times God made His presence known to me in ways I will never forget.
In fact, as a Christian for almost three decades, if I have a big trial in my life, I rarely seek out a pastor or other spiritual mentor because I believe there is no greater help I can get than what I can receive from God if I truly seek His face.
There's no need for me to go over and over my problems with someone when in all actuality, there is the Greatest Problem Solver of all merely waiting for me to become still at His feet.
Though I go to sleep at night speaking to my Father and sometimes wake up in the morning with a prayer on my lips and speak to God throughout the day too, I know I still need to pray more.
And maybe praying that I won't enter into temptation is also praying that I won't enter into the temptation of not praying.
All I really know is that God is worth the effort and this year, if I have any resolution it is this: I want to talk to God more because I need His presence in my life more--more than I need anything.
I need to pray that I will pray.
And that's the view from this catbird seat...